The Velmaverse. Blog One

  This is the Velmaverse.  Population...ME!  This is where I can be me and nobody can stop me from doing such.  However, since you are all guests here in my Velmaverse, let me just give you an introduction.

  I'm Nicole, otherwise known as Velma.  I was born the same year Prince Charles married Lady Diana Spencer (my role model), MTV premiered and ten men died on hunger strike in Northern Ireland.  For those of you less fortunate to have been born in the most awesome decade on the planet, Google these things to see what year they have in common.  I was born and raised and reside in New Jersey, but hope, someday, to be living in a place that is NOT affiliated with the so-called "Guidos and Guidettes" that are advertised on that sub-par show called "Jersey Shore."  MTV, you have lost the little respect that I had left for you due to you damaging the reputation of good people from New Jersey such as myself.

  I grew up in an Italian American household with Italian American grandparents with Italian American values.  You fuck up once and you get your ass handed to you on a pewter platter with Marinara sauce.  We were the "pioneers" on our block in the town of Bayonne, seriously!  We were the first to have cable, therefore we were the first to have MTV.  And I remember vividly my aunt Gina and cousin Marguerite skipping school to come over and watch it.  Due to their frequently watching of said channel, I also noticed that my aunt lost more brain cells than my cousin because my aunt dropped out of high school and my cousin went on to college. 

  I was profoundly influenced by music, mainly Def Leppard.  Sorry, they rock and if you say they suck you're gonna wake up with a Michael Kors black flat shoe up your ass.  Their music kicks you in the face, proverbially.  It rocks and this is the only band you're ever going to find where the drummer only has one arm.  Rick Allen, you rock and don't you dare refute me!  What's said and done is meant to be said and done. 

  I had the most interesting of influences in my life.  In addition to Diana, Princess of Wales, I also had George Carlin, Sam Kinison and Robin Williams to help mold and shape me into the person that I am today.  I credit George with my cynicism and realism, Sam for my ranting and screaming, and Robin with my ability to speak in various tones and accents. 

  So, here's a "Terms of Agreement" if you want to explore the Velmaverse.  I am totally for real in what I say and refuse to hold back.  If you don't like what I have to say, you are free to turn away and not read it.  It's all good!  Now, rock on and enjoy!

xoxo Velma