When I turned 30, I looked back on my life and began the "What Ifs." What if I had met the right one? What if I had gotten married? What if I had kids by now? All that stuff! I saw my friends and school mates go from being students to being parents with responsibilities. Here I am! Single, traveling and living life. There were times when I wanted to be a wife and mother before this age. But, I guess God had to give me a few lessons to learn before I become such. Maybe now I am ready to become a wife and mother. I just had to walk before I could run first.
I can relate to Nia Vardalos' character, Toula Portokalos, in the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." 30 years old, waiting for her life to start. Then, she meets this incredibly wonderful guy and they fall in love. My life is kind of similar to that, but with that one pot hole in the road. However, I did meet this wonderful guy quite a few times and he made my heart go zing for the first time ever and now, whenever I think about him, it zings left, right, center and sideways. Is this love or infatuation?? I'm still trying to figure this one out for myself. To me, love is like a math problem: You work on it till you finally get the right answer. I do hope that my heart zinging whenever I think of him IS the first symptom of this Calculus problem called love.
Now, on the subject of wifehood, I want my husband to know who wears and washes the pants in this marriage. Yes, it's all me, baby! I expect him to be a good, faithful partner and to be there whenever I need him, especially when I am on my period and find myself watching "Terms of Endearment" at an ad nauseum rate. Ahh, nothing like the feel of a man who has become proverbially emasculated after watching Shirley MacLaine screaming "GIVE MY DAUGHTER THE SHOT!!" over 20 times. But I also expect him to get me chocolate, rub my shoulders and to, and when I feel like it as well, satisfy me in THAT way. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about and let's not go there.
On the subject of motherhood, I know that I will try to be a great mom. Be supportive of my children in whatever they choose and for who they are. When it comes to my children, I am going to be a mother first before I am their friend. I will make sure they do their homework first before they play any video games or go on Facebook. And if they don't like it, no Facebook and no video games. Simple as that. My way or go to your room sans computer. If you bully my child, whether in real life or through the internet, you will incur my wrath and I will be on your ass like shit on Velcro.
So, God, if you are listening, I've learned my lessons. I learned that love can hurt, it can be kind as well as cruel, but it can also be the most wonderful thing to experience. I also learned not to stick magnets onto my car because they will stick permanently if left on for long periods of time. And to also have patience when it comes to children because one day I will have some of my own and they will eventually pick out my nursing home when I get into my Geriatric years. I also learned never to quit if something doesn't work out and to always show infinite patience even though I do want to quit. Unlike Sarah Palin! Hear my prayers, God. I am ready.
Inhaling...
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