Cutting It In Half

  I read in the news today that Mel Gibson has just settled his divorce from his first wife, Robin.  Now, the whole thing about them being married for 31 years kind of shocked me because Hollywood marriages don't have a great reputation in the longevity department.  Then again, the Privacy department is not too well either.  But what truly shocked me was what she got in the end:  the former Mrs. Gibson walked away with HALF of what Mr. Gibson owns!  Mel was worth $850 MILLION dollars, therefore she got $425 million dollars.  How did this happen?  There was no Pre-Nuptial Agreement when they first got married.  So now you can say Mel Gibson is half the man he used to be, both monetarily and figuratively. 

  Eddie Murphy once discussed this subject of having to give half when a relationship ends in his comedy special "Raw."  I am just reiterating on what he said back then.  This material is not new, just being re-told. 

  I believe that this subject of wanting half in a demised relationship all depends on how good things were between them.  Half the time, I take the woman's side of things.  The other half, I am on the opposite end.  Yes, I do sympathize with men sometimes because they have to put up with a lot of shit that us women dish out to them.

  For example, if you were married for a long time to your man and you accumulated your assets (both physically and monetarily) by working together, this is where I feel you have a sense of entitlement.  You worked hard by doing it together and then the relationship ends.  You're both now working in the private sector, so to speak.  However, you both worked for it and now you two must work out who gets what.  Whose name is on the house you two shared?  Who has to move out and find a place of their own?  Who is going to run the business?  Are you going to run it together?  All that jazz!  Now, depending if the relationship ended, be it amicable or angrily, depends on how things are dished out.  This is where the above story applies.  When Mel beat that gold digger's behind, Robin came to his aid and defended him.  Now why Mel let her get away is between them and is absolutely none of my business.

  Another example is when someone who acquired their wealth on their own and they hook up with someone who has wealth of their own.  Things end between them and then one or the other feel they are ENTITLED to the other's wealth.  This is where I am split down the middle.  I feel that if you've got enough to get by on your own, don't seek any financial support whatsoever from your significant ex.  Child support is perfectly fine, if you have them.  But this "spousal support" bullshit, COME ON!  He or she supported you enough when you were together!  Why the hell do you think you're entitled to a "paycheck" now that you're no longer together?  Most common excuse:  To keep up with the lifestyle I'm accustomed to.  PFFT!  You got your own money, maintain your lifestyle with THAT! 

  Next example, and this one makes me so sick that I have to hold back the urge to vomit.  Someone (almost always a man) who has acquired his wealth on his own gets together with someone who doesn't have anything.  The relationship ends and now the person who didn't bring anything into the relationship to begin with wants HALF of what the other person has.  To this I must ask you "WHY?!"  You came with nothing and now you're going back to that state.  Hey, unless this person decides that you deserve a "Consolation Stipend," then you are no way entitled to HALF of their stuff.  So put down that box of HIS stuff, grab whatever clothes you had on your back when you came in and get out!  This is where I side with men a lot of the time.

  I, for one, know I am going to someday enter this institution.  I definitely know I will be a great wife.  I'm supportive, faithful, loving and we all know I have a great sense of humor.  I can also cook without having to burn the house down.  But, the one thing I want in my future Mr. Velma is that he loves what he does as an occupation and can include me in some of the things he does.  I want him to be able to let me hang out with his friends.  Why?  Because they've known him longer and I want to get some "dirt" on him as well.  If you don't take out that trash right now, I am going to put on that Carpenters song you love to sing out loud inside your car on the way to work.  I'm sneaky that way! 

  I would add in Sex, but that's something that should be done once or twice in a while and with great urgency.  It should also end with two huge smiles!